


Deep Blue, Painted Golden

by SunriseRose1023



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, American Football, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Attempted Sexual Assault, Betrayal, Celebrities, Depression, Drugs, F/M, Football, Gen, Hospitalization, Injury, Injury Recovery, Legal Drama, Major Character Injury, Modern Era, Non-Consensual Drug Use, References to Depression, Serious Injuries, Sexual Content, Sexual Harassment, Sexual Tension, Sports, Suicidal Thoughts, Therapy, musician - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-06 07:03:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21222536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunriseRose1023/pseuds/SunriseRose1023
Summary: Steve Rogers is the all-American quarterback of the New York Avengers football team. He’s a man everyone looks up to, a role model for both his fans and his teammates. Steve has held up well under the pressures of fame, but as he’s growing older, he’s wondering if the field is all he’ll ever have.Y/N Carter is the biggest pop star on the planet. Discovered when she was barely a teenager, Y/N has been in and out of the tabloids, not only because of her unparalleled talent, but also to her trail of star-studded exes. After fifteen years in the spotlight, Y/N is struggling, not only with inspiration, but with life in general.A meeting by chance, an idyllic courtship, an amicable goodbye, and a shocking betrayal send Steve and Y/N on a whirlwind rollercoaster of emotions. Can Steve get to her before she hits rock bottom? Does Y/N have anything left to give him? Can they find a way to make it work?





	1. Chapter 1

“All I’m saying, how long do you expect to be doing this for? Would it be the worst thing to get a little backup plan going?”  
“He’s not going to be selling cars like Terry Bradshaw. He could break into movies or—“  
“Get real.”

Steve snorted a laugh, shaking his head when the men in the room turned to look at him. 

“Go ahead. Keep talking about me like I’m not here. In fact, let me go ahead and leave you to it.”

The team of lawyers and his agent all started protesting and Steve shook his head, sliding his phone out of his pocket as he left the office. He tapped the screen a few times as he waited for the elevator, stepping inside it and typing out a text. He moved to rest a hip against the railing at the back, staring at his phone when the elevator stopped on the next floor. He listened to the elevator door open and shut, heard a muffled whispering from the people who’d climbed onto the elevator with him. 

“Excuse me, mister?”

God, kids with lisps just melted his heart. He looked up from his phone, seeing the little boy in front of him widen his eyes.

“It _is _you! You’re Steve Rogers!”

Steve smiled, nodding his head as he crouched down, holding out a hand. 

“Hey, buddy. How are you?”

The little boy grinned, showcasing the space where his front teeth should be, the cause of the lisp. He enthusiastically shook Steve’s hand, then turned that brilliant smile towards the woman before them. 

“Mom! Mom, look! It’s Steve Rogers!”  
“I see, baby. Did you tell him how you love watching his games?”

The little boy nodded as he looked back to Steve. 

“Me and my dad watch all your games, Mister Rogers. You’re our favorite QB in the whole league.”

Steve smiled. 

“Well, thank you, buddy. I hope you watch this next season.”  
“Oh, we are. You’re going to take us to the Super Bowl this year, Dad swears.”  
“I’m going to do my best.”  
“Hey, Mom?”

Steve stood and watched the boy whisper to his mother, who turned to Steve with an apologetic look on her face. 

“Would you mind if we took a picture?”

Steve shook his head. 

“Not at all. I love getting pictures with future QBs.”

The little boy grinned up at him. 

“I’m not a great thrower, but I can run like hell.”

Steve laughed as the mother admonished the child, turning to Steve and shaking her head. 

“He knows better than to talk like that. His father …”

She rolled her eyes and Steve smiled. 

“We need fast receivers worse than we need QBs. Come here, bud.”

Steve knelt to the kid’s level, both of them giving the camera a thumb’s up. Steve signed the back of a receipt the mom found in her purse for the kid, then another one for his dad, thanking the both of them before they all exited the elevator. Steve could hear the kid chattering away as he went for the parking garage, keeping his head down to try and detract the fans. He found his truck and climbed inside, starting it up and leaning his head back. 

_“Incoming call from Bucky Barnes.”_

Steve nodded, tapping a button on his steering wheel. 

“Rogers.”  
_“Rogers, this is Barnes. Where the fuck are you?”_

Steve smiled, closing his eyes. 

“Leaving Fury’s office. You?”  
_“Ooh, what did you get called to the principal’s office for? Were you fraternizing with a cheerleader again?”_  
“That was one time, and come to think of it, wasn’t that you and not me?”

The line was quiet and Steve snorted. 

“Busted.”  
_“Seriously though. Everything kosher?”_  
“As kosher as it gets with Fury. They’re pushing the retirement angle.”  
_“Again? Fuck that shit. You’ve still got a few good years left in you. That cannon’s not ready to be put down just yet.”_

Steve smiled, rolling his shoulder, letting out a sigh. 

“I don’t know, Buck. Maybe they’ve got a point.”  
_“Maybe you need to not go down that road again. I can’t stand you when you wallow.”_  
“Well, I can barely stand you on a good day, so…”  
_“Jackass.”_

Steve laughed, shaking his head. 

“I don’t know. I just … maybe I just need to get away for awhile. We don’t start camp for—”  
_“Shit, we’ve got plenty of time before camp. Hey, I’ve got a friend who’s been bugging me to visit the south of France with her. Want to tag along?”_  
“As long as this one doesn’t believe we’re a two-for-one kind of deal.”

Bucky cackled through the speakers and Steve rolled his eyes. 

_“Oh, hey. You remember Wanda Maximoff?”_  
“Wasn’t she one of our cheerleaders?”  
_“Yeah, from a few years ago. We kept in touch once she left and she’s in a new play in the West End, says she can get me a couple tickets if I want to come see it.”_  
“The West End? Isn’t that London?”  
_“Right-o, Geography Jack. Want to go visit jolly old England?”_

Steve pursed his lips, raising his eyebrows. 

“I haven’t seen London in a while.”  
_“So let’s go, just me and you. We can catch Wanda’s play, catch up with her and have pints in the middle of the afternoon.”_

Steve rolled his eyes, but smiled. 

“Let’s do it. Want me to book the flights?”  
_“If you mean do I want Maria to book the flights, then yes. Yes, I do. In the good hotel with the turndown service.”  
“_There was a ‘please’ in there, wasn’t it?”  
_“Not for you. I send Maria flowers for all the crap she does for you.”  
_“For us.”  
_“‘S what I said.”_

Steve shook his head, straightening in the seat and pulling his seatbelt on. 

“I’ll call her and get it started. How soon do you want to go?”  
_“You know me, baby. I’m up for anything, anytime. I’m just following you, Captain.”_  
“I’ll text you the details.”

Steve ended the call, putting the truck in reverse and driving out of the parking lot. He couldn’t tell his best friend, but he was dying for a change of scenery. He needed to get away from everyone knowing who he is, having photographers track his every move, seeing his face on the cover of every magazine at the checkout stand. 

He loved his job, and he honestly liked the fame that came with it. He knew what he was getting into when he signed up for the draft. He liked having the models on his arm when he was younger, but now … the older he got, the more aches that set in, the more he was longing for something more. 

He wasn’t sure what that was just yet. Something outside a football field? He didn’t have any skills other than being a quarterback, and a damn good one at that. Five Super Bowl rings, seven Pro Bowl appearances, endorsement deals with Nike and Gatorade, and thousands of adoring fans across the country. It was nice being Steve Rogers; he had a good life and he was grateful for it. 

But he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing. 

* * *

You stirred the eggs in the pan, sprinkling in some cheese and smiling when it melted. You moved the tea kettle off the burner as soon as it began to whistle, grabbing the toast as it popped out of the toaster. You glanced over your shoulder and smiled as your cousin made her way down the hall, eyes widening and blinking. 

“You made breakfast?”  
“Cheesy eggs, toast, and tea. It’s not exactly a spread, but—“  
“It’s more than the protein bar I was going to have. Thank you, darling.”

Peggy sat at the table and you brought her a plate, setting it in front of her and passing her the salt and pepper. You went back and fixed your own plate, then took the seat across from her. Peggy took a bite and sighed, the blissful look on her face bringing a smile to yours. 

“Absolutely delightful.”  
“Why, thank you.”

Peggy smiled, sipping her tea. 

“Any plans today?”

You shook your head, glancing out the window. 

“Maybe walk around and explore a bit. No one’s supposed to know that I’m here, so maybe I can have a minute to rest.”

Peggy nodded, and the conversation stilted, the silence that settled over the two of you growing suddenly uncomfortable. You sighed, pushing a hand through your hair. 

“I know you want to ask, and I promise I’ll tell you. I just … I need to just breathe for a while.”  
“I completely understand, darling. Take your time.”

You nodded, and Peggy lifted her teacup. 

“Just …”

You lifted your eyes towards her and she sighed. 

“You’re not in trouble, are you?”  
“If you mean ‘is the mob going to be coming after me,’ the answer is no. Trouble … is a finicky word.”  
“But you’re alright?”

You sighed, pushing the eggs around on your plate. 

“I don’t know anymore.”  
“Is there anything I can do to help?”  
“Besides give up half your living space to me? Honestly, Peg. You’ve done more than enough.”  
“I just want you to feel comfortable here. You’re always welcome with me, and I hope you know that.”

Tears filled your eyes and you nodded. Peggy reached across the table and you took her hand, giving a shaky sigh. 

“I’ll be okay. I just need a break.”  
“Take all the time you need, dear.”

She gave your hand a squeeze, then dabbed her napkin at her lips. 

“I’ve got to hurry or I’ll be late. Can’t afford to get sacked from this job.”

You smiled and she drank the rest of her tea, taking her empty plate to the sink and coming back to kiss your cheek. 

“Take the day and be lazy. I’m not sure you’ve done that since you were fourteen years old.”  
“I was so busy back then.”  
“I know, darling.”

Peggy turned and walked away, and you crossed your arms over your chest, looking out at the dreary morning. You took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, smiling back at Peggy when she walked into the room with her purse in her hand and heels on her feet. 

“Don’t turn on the telly if you can help it.”  
“Why?”

She didn’t answer and you hung your head, putting your elbows on the table and your head in your hands. Peggy walked over and kissed the top of your head, nails gently scritching your back before she made her way out the door. 

You lifted your head and stared out the window, shaking your head and giving a deep sigh. You’d wanted to see this side of London, the small village Peggy called home, but the more you thought about it, the more you let your anxiety get the better of you, and you decided to stay in today. You left the dishes in the kitchen sink and walked back down the hall to the spare bedroom Peggy had set up for you. There was a picture of you on the nightstand from your sixteenth birthday, the first time you played Madison Square Garden. You were standing on the stage in the pale pink dress you loved, a wide smile on your lips, glitter in your hair and around your eyes, tears shining on your cheeks. 

You picked up the picture and ran your fingers over the glass. You shook your head, giving a deep sigh as you set the frame back on the nightstand, dropping your robe and crawling back into bed, pulling the covers over your head.


	2. Chapter 2

“You’ve got to get out of this house.”

Your eyes were wide when you turned to face your cousin. Peggy shook her head, arms crossed over her chest. You blinked and Peggy sighed. 

“There’s a little pub down the road that we can—“  
“No.”

Peggy raised an eyebrow. 

“Go get dressed.”  
“Peg—“  
“This is a new stipulation of mine. If you stay with me, we must go visit the pub.”

You narrowed your eyes before you sighed. 

“Peggy.”  
“Don’t ‘Peggy’ me. What will it hurt? Go get dressed. Throw a cap on or something. I don’t care. You’ve got to get out of this house and have some human interaction.”  
“I can’t interact with other humans. They all think they know me and they all want something from me.”  
“Not here.”

You let your head fall back, shifting on the couch. 

“I have fans in London, Peggy.”  
“Yes, I know. But the people around here … they don’t get starstruck. Did you know that Brad and Angelina used to stay here when they were still together?”  
“That’s not true.”  
“It is! I saw them at the pub once or twice.”

You sighed, chewing on your bottom lip. Peggy sighed, walking over and sitting beside you, laying a hand on your knee. 

“What will it hurt?”  
“No one knows I’m here and I’d really like to keep it that way.”  
“Absolutely no one knows that you’re here?”

You nodded. 

“Not the press, not even Sharon.”

Peggy raised her eyebrows. 

“Your _sister _doesn’t even know that you’re here?”

You shook your head. 

“I had to get away. I … I felt like I was drowning. I called you and hopped on the plane.”

Peggy nodded, moving her hand to hold yours. 

“You know you can always come to me. But I really need to get out of this house. As much as I love your cooking, I need greasy fried chips and a glass of wine.”

You smiled, then sighed. 

“Okay. Let me find a hat or something.”

Peggy gave an excited squeal and you laughed, crawling off her couch and heading for your room.

* * *

Steve ducked his head as he followed Bucky and Wanda into the pub. They were huddled together, Wanda’s arm linked with Bucky’s, and he kept leaning in closer to hear what she was whispering to him. Steve felt like a major third wheel, and he slipped his hands in his pockets as he looked around. 

The pub was crowded, but not overrun with people. No one was paying him much attention, something that he was savoring. He enjoyed his fame, but there was something freeing about no one knowing—or at least not caring—who he was.

He nodded his thanks to Bucky when a pint of beer was pressed into his hand, and Steve smiled as he took a sip, then leaned his back against the bar. 

“Pardon me, can I step by you?”

Steve moved to let a dark-haired woman lean over the bar, lifting his head and doing a slow double-take when he saw a woman trying to blend into the background. She was gorgeous, hiding behind a beret-like hat on her head and a chunky scarf around her neck. She seemed familiar for some reason, and Steve took another sip of his beer, smiling when her eyes met his and widened. 

“If I can offer a piece of advice?”

Steve looked back to the dark-haired woman with her attention on the bartender. She looked to him, a demure smile on her painted red lips. 

“Don’t bother.”

Steve raised an eyebrow and she kept that smile. 

“She’s not looking for any sort of male companionship tonight.”  
“My apologies.”  
“Don’t worry about it. Just trying to save everyone the heartache.”

Steve had an amused smile on his face when he took another drink. 

“Maybe next time.”

The woman laughed, taking two martini glasses with neon green liquid in her hands. 

“I doubt it, but keep that optimistic streak. You’ll go far with it.”

Steve laughed, nodding to her as she walked back to her friend. Steve took a long drink from his beer, unable to keep his eyes off the woman with the sad eyes, claiming a booth in the far corner with her dark-haired companion. 

* * *

You shook your head, laughing out loud at … whatever it was Peggy had just said. You couldn’t remember what it was, but you knew it was something funny. You leaned back in the booth, smiling at her, laughing again when she snorted before she laughed. 

When you’d calmed down and took a sip from the beer she’d gotten you, Peggy leaned forward. 

“Did you know that tall man by the bar has been watching you all night?”

You nodded, swallowing the drink you’d taken. 

“I’m not going to lie. He’s pretty.”

Peggy snorted again, sending the two of you into fits of giggles. She tapped her nails on the table, then pointed at you. 

“You should go talk to him while you get us another round.”

You glanced towards the bar, then shook your head. 

“I’m not looking for anyone right now. God knows I need to be single for a while.”  
“Or maybe God is sending you a nice little present all wrapped up in a bow.”

Peggy glanced over her shoulder, then shook her head. 

“He’s American.”  
“Oh, really?”  
“Mm-hmm. The few words we said to each other, I could tell he was a filthy Yank.”

You laughed, leaning over and patting her arm. She pushed her empty bottle towards you and you groaned as you climbed out of the booth. You made your way to the bar, nodding and smiling at people before you let your arms rest on the bar. 

“I was wondering if you’d ignore me all night.”

You slid your eyes to the left, where the man who’d been watching you was leaning against the bar. You leaned over, speaking in a stage whisper. 

“Contrary to popular belief, I wasn’t paying you that much attention.”

He gave a soft laugh, and you let yourself look at him fully. He was … beautiful. Tall, with dark stubble dusting his cheeks and chin, thick muscles barely contained in his almost ridiculously tight shirt. But it was his eyes that had your attention. The bluest blue was staring back at you, smile lines beside his eyes only making him more attractive. 

“Like what you see, doll?”

You couldn’t stop the snort. 

“‘_Doll?_’ Are you kidding me right now?”

He started to open his mouth and you laughed, shaking your head.

“Next thing I know, you’ll be calling me a dame or something.”

He winced as he shook his head, taking a sip of his beer. You rolled your eyes. 

“You’re lucky you’re cute, because you’re not the greatest at talking to women.”  
“You think I’m cute?”

You felt your cheeks warm and you shook your head. He gave a soft laugh, leaning closer to you. 

“I’m Steve.”

You met his eyes, blinking in surprise when it seemed like he honestly didn’t know what your name was. You swallowed, speaking as low as he had. 

“Y/N.”  
“Nice to meet you.”  
“You, too.”  
“Can I buy you a drink?”

You blinked, feeling your head swim. You gave him a smile, leaning closer. 

“I really don’t need another. Don’t tell my cousin, but when she sent me to get us another round, it was always my plan to get us some water.”

Steve gave a quiet laugh. 

“Your secret’s safe with me, doll.”

You shook your head. 

“_‘Doll.’_ Like I’m a toy. Some little plaything for you.”  
“Or something pretty and fragile.”

You turned to meet his blue eyes again. 

“Something to be put on display, where everyone can see.”

Steve shook his head, leaning closer to you. 

“Rogers!”

He blew out his breath, glancing over his shoulder. He nodded, turning back to you. 

“Sorry, my friend—“  
“It’s okay. It was nice to meet you, Steve.”

You held out a hand and he took your hand in his, bringing it to his lips and kissing your knuckles. You sucked in a breath as he winked at you, letting your hand go as he stepped away, into the crowd. You felt your chest heave with every breath you took, your hand tingling where his lips had touched. You turned around and went back to the bar, shaking your head and gathering your things. Peggy shook her head, reaching out for you. 

“Darling, what is it? Are you alright?”  
“I want to go. Can we go?”

Peggy nodded, gathering her things and ushering you out into the cool night air. 

* * *

Steve kept his hands in his pockets, absently kicking a rock down the sidewalk, ignoring Bucky and Wanda making out beside him. He couldn’t get your face out of his mind, still couldn’t shake the desire to take you in his arms and hold you until that haunted look left your pretty eyes. 

“You do know who you were talking to at the bar, right?”

Steve lifted his head, looking over to Wanda. She had her arms around Bucky, her chin resting on his chest as he held her, his head dipping to nip at her neck. Steve shrugged his shoulders, shaking his head. 

“She said her name was Y/N.”

Wanda smiled. 

“Yeah, _Y/N Carter_. Only the biggest pop star in the entire universe.”

Bucky lifted his head, shaking it to get Wanda’s hair out of his face. 

“Wait, seriously?”

Steve blinked and Bucky gave a laugh. 

“Damn, son. Nice.”

Steve shook his head and Bucky squeezed Wanda’s sides. 

“Let’s take a bet. How long’s it going to be before we hear the song she writes about him?”  
“I don’t know, from what I heard, she’s still hung up on that guy from that band. You remember the one?”

Bucky nodded. 

“The Guardians of the Galaxy. Despite the lame-ass name, they’re not as awful as they could be.”

Steve shook his head and Bucky rolled his eyes. 

“Stevie’s stuck in the past when it comes to music. Anything after 1975, he’s iffy on.”

Wanda laughed, taking hold of Bucky’s jacket and pulling him in to kiss him again. Steve lifted his head and gave a breath of relief. 

“Here’s our cab. Thank God.”

* * *

Peggy shook her head, taking another sip from her glass of water before pointing at you. 

“Drink it down.”  
“I’m working on it.”  
“You don’t have to eat anything, but drink the water. You’ll thank me tomorrow.”  
“I’m working on it.”

Peggy rolled her eyes, taking another drink. She set her glass in the sink and walked to you, taking hold of your chin and kissing your cheek. 

“Don’t wake me before nine tomorrow or I’ll have to kill you.”  
“I’m not planning on being awake myself before noon.”  
“See, this is why I love you.”

You giggled, swatting Peggy’s ass as she made her way down the hall to her bedroom. As soon as she was gone, you pulled your phone from your pocket, pulling up the internet app. You wiggled your head for a moment, then rolled your eyes, typing “_Steve Rogers_” into the Google search bar. 

Your eyes widened as you saw the many images that popped up, articles galore. You clicked on one article, reading about how he was a Heisman trophy winner, first round draft pick, quarterback for the New York Avengers football team, where he’d led them to the championship game seven different times, winning five of those times. He was just a few years older than you, a mainstay on People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive list, and as all of the articles you clicked on made a point to announce, he was single. 

You tapped your phone against your hand, lifting it again to flip through the Google images, eyes widening when you saw a shot of him in just his football pants, laughing out loud and feeling your cheeks flush when you ran across a photo of a younger version of him apparently modeling Calvin Klein underwear. You bit your lip, unable to keep the smile from your face. 

The smile faded when you thought of how easy it would be to make a call and have all of his information laid at your feet. You could be texting him right now. All you’d have to do is call your sister. 

You set your phone on the kitchen counter, glancing out the window of Peggy’s little breakfast nook. The moon was high in the sky and you glanced up at it, slowly exhaling as you crossed your arms over your chest. 

You weren’t looking for anything. You had a long line of disastrous relationships you were trying to move past, men you thought you’d be able to build a life with, but in the end, all they wanted was either the notoriety of being with you or for you to cower behind them and build them up. How did you know Steve wasn’t just like all the rest of them?

You couldn’t say for sure, but there was something about him, something that sparked in your heart the first time you looked in his eyes, something that told you he was different than the rest. And knowing that, you also knew you had a choice here. You could pursue him the way you always had, by literally having your people contact his people, or you could let it happen organically, where _if_ you ran into him again, you could talk, and if not, oh well. 

You looked back up at the moon and closed your eyes, giving in to the little girl inside and making a wish. You blinked your eyes open and smiled, nodding your head as you walked towards your bedroom, humming a melody you’d just thought of.


End file.
